Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Stop, Marv, Okay?

Superheroes has always been a thing to me.
Especially they who are under the red flag of Marvel.

There are tons of them. With diverse superpowers. Made my childhood like, gangbanged in a superhero fantasy, sent me off to my adolescent phase hoping to witness the live-action movies of each hero—and my dream came true. As Spider-Man, X-Men and Fantastic 4 all invaded the screen and satisfied my lust.

Then some others came. Some that weren’t much of my favorites: The Incredible Hulk, Iron Man, Captain America. I initially didn’t really like them as much as I had this weird obsession towards X-Men or Fantastic 4 and, to make it worse, their movies turned out to fail me too. The Hulk was too dark and serious, Iron Man was too destructive –plus I finally realized something: what so superhero about Iron Man? He’s just a weakling covered with irons made by money, and Captain America was… There was nothing wrong with this one, I simply just started to get sick of Marvel’s newer heroes.

Then. To make it all the worst, all of them were PROUDLY joined forces. With a bunch of more heroes I had no interests in, and some others that I didn’t even know! No Wolverine, no Mr. Fantastic and their companions, why should I be excited about these things?

Marvel indeed got me bored but then, who am I really?
The world liked what they did so, HEROES INVASION began.

They succeeded on so many levels. Ever since, they kept planning sequels back-to-back in tight schedule like a barbaric animal, recreate stuff, getting all cluttered and, ugh, it’s just too much for me! Although obviously, it’s nowhere near “too much” for everybody else in this universe because, as you know, they never stop demanding more and more hero tales.

I kept holding back. When my friends kept talking about new hero movies and stuff, yes, I kept holding back. I stopped updating about Marvel’s newest shits if it’s not about X-Men or Fantastic 4 –yes, I even got sick of Spider-Man I didn’t watch any of those “Amazing” series crap. I lost count of what sequel it was for Thor, for Captain America, I didn’t even have interest in “Age of Ultron”!

Yes I kept holding back, until I finally reached my limit.

Spider Man that’s just too young, and Fantastic 4 with black Johnny Storm?
Seriously, this has got to stop right now, Marvel.
Pic of Peter and his underrated cast is from here, while Johnny's from here.

I’m a fvcking OCD person, for God’s sake. I brought this matter long ago when Chris Evans played both Johnny Storm and Captain America and I was all raging in disappointment about it.

Enough with Spider-Man, will you!? First of all, this new Peter is just too young. It disgusted me. Then knowing the fact that now there are three Peter Parker’s in total, it’s not nice at all! I know, maybe you’re following the path of Batman –or, James Bond?– that has more than one actor for each role but… It’s somehow not just working for Spider-Man ;(

And black Johnny Storm… What the hell—go to hell, Marvel. You fail me, you fail many of your sharp and critical fans but most annoying-ly, you fail Stan Lee. It’s not about this new actor is black, ew, no! Drop all those racism shits. It’s just, c’mon you know that Johnny Storm is supposed to be white and is a biological younger brother to Susan Storm. So stop being innovatively nonsense, and quit making such unnecessary changes—and please, go to hell of Human Torch’s flame on.

And here's the worst thing. With Peter and Johnny initially being best bud, there will always be this big chance to make Spider-Man | Fantastic 4 movie. If that happens, and Marvel uses the current casts instead of Jessica Alba and the gang plus Tobey Maguire, well, I knew it for so long that you've been conspiring to ruin my OCD senses, Marvel.

Pic's from here.

Oh look how much I’ve complained about this.

Don’t get me wrong because I know more than anyone else in my circle about Marvel’s license share things. Some go with FOX, some with Sony, but why—you have all the rights to monitor everything and stop those studios –and YOURSELF– from overdoing those stupid changes.

Sorry but I’m not one of those people you gladly get benefits from. This has been a fiesta for them so-called superheroes geeks but seriously, for me, and hopefully there are some others who feel this way too—this is too much, and has gone too far.

I lost Fantastic 4. And I lost them in such failed reboot. Well who am I to talk, the film is not even released yet—you know what, I’m not talking about quality because this version could possibly be better and much more entertaining, who knows? I’m instead just talking about how too soon these reboots are made. And with some useless digression—oh I’m done talking.

Dear Marvel,
I sincerely hope you never get your license back for X-Men.

And dear FOX, please,
Don’t ruin my beloved X-Men franchise just
Don’t. Ever. Reboot. X-Men.

No comments:

Post a Comment