Let Us Know, Let Us Help

Choices.

Whoever you are, you own them.

Especially people your age. Teenagers. Somehow unstable, curious and a bit silly. You guys can't stop to taste new things and along the way, choices appear. But no matter good or bad, big or small, easy or complicated... You have rights to choose and rights to obtain respects from others.

But how, if what you choose, is something sensitive? Something that most societies around you are against about. Something big, and different, that if anybody else ever know about that, feels like world collapses. Something... wrong...

Well then came another choice; choice to conceal what you chose. You hide everything. From your parents, your best buddies, your teachers, everybody. Literally everybody. You think that you better keep your mouth shut instead of being stranded by others.

So there you go. Living the fake life. You smile a lot, whereas inside, you can't run from anxiety. You act like everything's just fine, but inside, you're so not good. You feel stressed, and fed up, but... there is no way you're going to mention a single thing about who you are.

Everything are just lies and pretense. Full of drama. Like when you turn on your television, and you found out some corny TV series aired every night. Yes, that drama. Difficult, and seem to have never-ending troubles, but lame.

Why lame? Why should hiding things be lame?

Because you're all alone. You have nobody to share, nobody to run to when you're down. Even your most trustworthy person.

You're just too young. Too scared to face the incoming responses right after you tell people the truth. About how they are going to react. How they are going to treat you. How their respects and feelings toward you are going to change, significantly.

No. You won't live such miserable life, will you?

Then confess. Well it sounds harder that just saying that, but... give it a shot, pals. You have no idea of which life yours would be, better or worse, until you try coming out and let people around you know who you are.

The beginning will never be as easy as blinking eyes. Every nightmare you've been worrying about could probably happen. But keep in mind, friend, that they love you. Your friends love you, your family loves you, your parents love you. They might be hard to you at first, but sooner or later they'll get any soften. They'll approach you. They'll help.

The thing is, you start first. How can you expect people around you got your back, when they have no idea about how you doing? Don't bother thinking about who will going to leave you. Try to think about who will be staying by your side after you come out.

At least you can discover which friends are friends, and which friends are just 'friends'. Your real comrades will be there for you, lighten your burden by the vast access to share. You will be no longer on your own.

Also consider about your health. This is somewhat vital. If you just keep it yourself, then face this, you'll feel the suffer all yourself too. No matter how well you know about the virus and how slick you are to hide your pain, you still need professional touches of healthcare and social services. Think about it well.

After all, you need support. You're just too green to experience this. Too early, too fast. You might know nothing about how to deal with this. But maybe your parents know. Maybe your friends are experts in this. Or maybe your little brother are much more knowledgeable than you. Everybody could possibly help you. You just don't know.

I know it's difficult. Believe me, I know exactly how you feel. I know how hard it is, struggling and surviving for your own good. I know how worrying it is, when people come and touch even the outermost layer of your secret. I know how shattering it is, when people make fun of the thing they have no idea that you are actually belong to. I know. I'm quiet familiar with that.

I made this by myself, what do you think?

What I don't know is, which way you will take. It's now back to you, everything. Whether you want to tell the world, or some people, or just keep silent maybe? Your choice.

Just remember a thing.

You have a future, a bright future.

You have more things to be considered about.

So save your teenage dream, save yourself.

P.S. : so this writing was made to be contested. i lost, but somehow i love the post and therefore... i just let it stay here ;)

Isn't It A Week of Support

setuju gak sih? awal minggu, gue lupa hari apa, ada final beregu bulutangkis putra Indonesia vs Malaysia yang ng-gereget-in banget karena kemarennya di partai yang sama buat putri, Indonesia harus kalah dari Thailand

dan meski lagi di kosan, gue bela belain turun ke ruang tamu, gabung sama orang orang yang lagi nyiapin diri buat presentasi ketua BEM, cuma buat nonton mereka yang alhamdulillah menang

trus beberapa hari kemudian Indonesia ketemu Malaysia lagi di pertandingan terakhir grup A bola U-23, yang sebenernya gak krusial banget gara gara dua duanya fix lanjut ke knock out. yaaa walopun kalah tapi seneng gak sih kalian liat pelatih Malaysia diusir keluar lapangan??

dan kemaren, bagi gue, adalah puncak segala dukungan.

Badminton Singles, Final Round

Senayan Sport Complex

Saturday, November 19th 2011

parah. gue naik busway (again, as i did last week) ke Gelora Bung Karno dengan indahnya tanpa suatu hambatan berarti dan sampe sana jam 12. ketemu ichoy trus beli tiket di tribun A6 yang agaknya sedikit condong ke dalam dan setara dengan kursi VIP. emang pinter ini bocah satu dalam mengakali keterbatasan dana

jam setengah 1 udah di depan pintu, gabung ama jutaan orang lainnya yang udah siap siaga disono biar dapet tempat terajib. jam 1 orangnya dateng, buka pintu daaaaaann... yiha, macem bagi bagi daging kurban. isinya orang kesakitan minta tolong sama marah marah gara gara didorong. posisi badan gue dong yang paling asik, melengkung sodara sodara macem sedotan. mana stuck gara gara depan belakang memberi tekanan pula kan. tapi seru banget gila haha

gue masuk duluan, ninggalin ichoy sama ocit yang masih berjibaku di belakang. bodo ah, langsung aja gue lari ke dalem nyari spot yang masih kosong. yasudah duduklah kita di tengah tengah dan itu cukup strategis

jam 2, baru deh dimulai. dibuka sama tari jaipong plus basa basi MC, gak lama masuk deh dua pasang ganda putri Indonesia

left: http://www.cekskor.com/news/read/6253/dua-gelar-dibawa-pulang-dari-vietnam

right: http://peta-kota.blogspot.com/2011/06/vita-marissanadya-melati-takluk-di.html

All Indonesian Final, Anneke/Nitya vs Nadya Melati/Vita Marissa. gue kira ini bakal garing karena gada perjuangan ngedukungnya kan, eh ternyata... serunya gak ketulungan. udah gak jelas deh gue dukung siapa

left: http://www.tribunsport.com/olympic/kidohendra-melaju-simon-tumbang/

right: http://sports.okezone.com/read/2010/09/25/40/375896/40/harapan-indonesia-pupus-di-semifinal

sama juga pas Bona/Ahsan vs Markis Kido/Hendra Setiawan. ah gile berasa nonton tinju. apalagi pas udah selesai. tuh atlet pada ngelempar macem macem kan. gue udah lari larian turun ampe maju ke pager, eh malah dilempar ke belakang. becanda kan

http://w0rld-sp0rts.blogspot.com/2011/05/firdasari-pastikan-kemenangan-indonesia.html

pertandingan ke-3, ini dia baru dimulai dukungan. Firdasari lawan Fu Mingtian dari Singapura. paling asik sih ngecengin supporter mereka. udah bawel bekoar koar pas di-woo-in trus kuncup macem kura kura masuk cangkang. tapi sayang, Firdasarinya atit. menang deh si Mingtian. tapi inget, udah sakit pun masih rubber set, dan deuce pula!! gila kan emang

http://sports.okezone.com/read/2011/08/14/40/491772/natsir-tantowi-tumbang-garuda-tanpa-gelar

next was mixed doubles Owi/Butet vs Thailand (males search namanya) and they were above the wind. menang gampang tapi tetep... jangan jumawa. yang seru, supporter Thailand kan bawa bedug. pas mereka lagi maen, supporter Indonesia -yang emang dasarnya bangsat, tukang ngecengin dan bacot- malah nyanyi "sauuur, saur..." tai semuanya, tai! tapi tetep luvley :">

http://suaramerdeka.com/v1/index.php/read/sport/2011/03/18/9407/Simon-Santoso-ke-Semifinal

nah terakhir baru deh Simon Santoso lawan Tanongsak Saensomb dari Thailand. ini baru klimaks. tenaga gue emang selalu abis buat singles. set pertama menang mudah, set kedua kumat, set ketiga baru deh mati matian

alhamdulillah menang banyak. empat kali nyanyi Indonesia Raya dari lima partai? sekarang dada gue sakit kalo batuk atau ketawa. tapi yaaa gila lo kapan lagi boy nonton badminton live

pulangnya pengen berburu foto dulu, tapi karena kelamaan dan udah gerimis, kita pun bubaran. gue ke FX ketemu bang ryo, makan makan lucu dulu trus pulang naik busway

nah disini deh nih gue baru sadar kalo rakyat Indonesia udah ketemu begini-beginian, apapun rela mereka kerjain. jadi gue pulang berbarengan dengan bubarnya pertandingan semifinal bola U-23 Indonesia lawan Vietnam. sumpah ya itu halte busway penuhnya bukan main. isinya merah semua dan gue yakin malingnya ada dimana mana

bangga? ya, banget. walopun gue yakin setelah Sea Games ini semuanya jadi sebodo amet lagi ama Indonesia, tapi paling nggak ada satu wadah yang bikin kita jadi nyatu begini kan?

yea, whatever...

I still belong to you, RedWhite

Espouse Our Blood, Support Our Bones

hey there again haha gatau kenapa nih gue lagi cinta banget sama blog gue. bagus sih, jadinya bentar bentar mau balik, bentar bentar klik 'new post' trus bentar bentar publish post baru dan bentar bentar blog gue banyak yang datengin kan haha

the point is, my lust in blogging is on a blast! yea, it is as burning as the passion of all the people of Indonesia in supporting their country in 26th SEA GAMES INDONESIA 2011

http://sports.okezone.com/read/2011/07/25/43/484112/inasoc-gelar-technical-delegation

apalagi di sepak bola. U-23 nya lagi jadi favorit semua orang. macho banget ye gak sih? Kamboja digencet, Singapura terlibas, Thailand minta ampun... tapi jangan jumawa wey, inget di atas langit masih ada langit. apalagi abis ini mau lawan Malaysia. gak gampang tuh. ya pokoke rakyat Indonesia lagi dalam masa gembira-gembiranya deh

dan kemaren pas gue ke GBK nontonin Indonesia-Thailand, gue mempelajari beberapa sifat unik supporter Indonesia yang mungkin sih -mungkin loh ya, bukannya gue sok tau- gak ditemuin di supporter dari negara lain

Roar of a Lion, Power of an Ape

ngerti kan gimana bacotnya orang Indonesia pas lagi dukung timnas? apalagi kalo mereka lagi di GBK, satu satunya wadah dimana air horn yang laknat itu bisa berkumandang dimana mana? belum lagi pas gol. itu pager pembatas udah macem climbing wall, dikerubutin semua orang yang lagi kegirangan sambil tereak tereak... bukan main yah orang Indonesia itu

Easily Excited

bukan cuma gampang seneng dan gampang cinta kalo pas timnas lagi main oke aja, tapi juga di moment moment lain. kayak moment masuk tipi. kalo mungkenye tiba tiba muncul di layar stadion, nah kaaaaaan senengnya berasa dapet hadiah umroh. tapi lucu sih ini, apalagi kalo lagi nonton langsung di GBK. deg degan gimanaaa gitu takut tiba tiba mungke gue yang muncul di layar *pede*

True Grudge Holder

kalo udah ngubungin supporter Indonesia sama 'grudge', udah pasti muncul Malaysia sebagai hasilnya. ini udah akut banget loh. kemaren pas Malaysia-Kamboja di GBK, itu tuh berasa lagi Malaysia-Indonesia karena satu stadion ngedukung Kamboja. emang deh ye tetangga kita yang satu itu udah keterlaluan sih, jadi digituin kan sama kita

Corny Moral

nah yang ini nih yang gue gasuka. parah kampungannya. siapapun lawannya, dimanapun mereka berada, selama disana ada supporter Indonesianya, pasti kedengeran suara "huuuu" gak sopan gitu deh. benci banget sumpah. inget gak dulu pas WCSA2010, siapapun yang main, kalo udah saatnya national anthem, pasti semua orang diem. bahkan di layar muncul tulisan "please quiet" atau apalah itu sejenisnya. lah kalo disini? jangan harep

suka gasuka, itulah rakyat Indonesia. mau gue ikut ikutan atau nggak, orang luar ngeliatnya gue sama aja; banyak bacot juga, pendendam juga, norak juga...

tapi gue sayang banget sama supporter Indonesia. gatau kenapa kalo udah ngedemprok jadi satu gitu jadi berasa kenal ama semuanya, jadi kerasa banget kalo kita itu satu negara. coba kalo lagi di tempat lain. lewat yaudah lewat aja, ada yang kenapa napa juga yaudah bodo amet

http://zendypoenya.blogspot.com/2011/01/10-negara-dengan-supporter-sepak-bola.html

alright, enough for today

just please, don't stop supporting

but please, mind your manner as well

and please, be the winner

For The First Time, A Gig!!

Jadi semua bermula dari rumah jam 1, naik busway, dempeti-dempetan dan panas-panasan penuh perjuangan ke rumah Dindut. Sampe sana udah jam 3, gue udah kayak Dead Man Walking.

Gapake istirahat gue langsung nyetir ke Central Park. Untung di mobil ada hiburan. Jadilah kami semua warm up dulu dengerin lagu-lagunya The Script, sambil siapin kebetan sama kisi-kisi berupa lirik sama playlist lagu yang kira-kira bakal muncul nanti.

Jam 6 udah ngedemprok di Pullman Ballrom bareng 4 ribuan manusia lainnya. Pas pintu dibuka, hemm... chaos lah ya pastinya. Pintu yang gue antriin stuck gatau kenapa. Sedangkan dua pintu sisanya udah terbuka lebar bagai pintu surga.

Jadilah kami merubah haluan. Gue udah gak peduli lagi langsung semua gue hantam, I'm a Man Who Can't Be Moved and everything around me were just Nothing. Tubuh gue yang tipis dan selincah kijang ini menembus riuhnya angry mob dan gue langsung dapet spot di tengah ballroom. Mayan lah.

Tapi yang bikin mpet, acara baru mulai jam 8. Itu juga baru basa-basi doang, opening dari Mike's sama Groovyland (yang menurut gue sih lumayan bagus, tapi karena mereka bawa lagu ampe 7 biji, orang-orang udah keburu demek... Kasian sih tapi liat mereka di-huuu-in) sama aduh apa ya itu satu lagi gue lupa namanya. Kaki udah leye-leye rasanya, You Won't Feel a Thing about your feet.

Pokoknya lama banget gila ampe akhirnya jam setengah 10, Before The Worst happened, they got up on stage and...

We Cry. Histeris. Ya, reaksi semua orang termasuk gue. Akhirnya gue bisa juga nonton apa yang gue mau setelah keabisan Maroon 5 sama gagal dengan manisnya pas Bruno Mars :')

Bang Danny, bang Mark ama bang Glen... Mereka semangat banget performnya. Kite sekampung ditweet pic pula hahaha. Mereka bawain 13 lagu. 4 dengan lancar gue nyanyiin tereak-tereak meski agak tone deaf, 6 gak apal sambil open source, 3 sisanya baru tau hari itu juga hehe.

picture belongs to @thescript, captured by Mark

Tapi gila lah. Kaco kaco kaco! Gue ampe bingung mau jelasin disininya kayak gimana. Yang pasti gue makin ngefans sama mereka yihaa!!

Tuntas acara, gue ngegembel dulu di depan stage. Tiap ada mas mas deketin pager, langsung datengin. Orang-orang dapet pick gitar, stick drum, selampe si Danny, kaos, lah gue cuma dapet kisi-kisi konser. Udah kayak orang dongo pas berebutan kertas, gue kira isi tanda tangan gitu kan. Gataunya... Haha yaa gapapa lah buat kenang-kenangan. But note this, The Script! If You Ever Come Back, i'll be getting more than just a piece of paper of your playlist!

Out of Central Park, it was not The End for me. Gue didrop di Sizzler deket GI trus... Lanjutin malmingan bareng some other friends HAHAHA mumpung lagi gak dicariin cuuy.

Okay, so in conclusion...

WHAT A WEEKEND, EH??

After all the struggle, all the waiting,

And all the standing for that long,

When i finished watching you guys,

I call it Breakeven

P.S. : tadi pagi gue liat siapa lah artis gajelas ngewawancarain The Script di tivi. agak pengen nimpuk sih sebenernya, tapi gue langsung inget perkataan Devina kalo kita harus sportif :')

So Close

November 11th 2011 has passed

if you noticed, it should be the day when the voting for New 7 Wonders of Nature candidates closed

okay so Amazon of Brazil, Puerto Princesa Underground River of Philippines, Jeju Island of South Korea, Iguazu Falls of Argentina and Brazil, Halong Bay of Vietnam, along with the Table Mountain of South Africa are the six of the seven winners (stated in random order, not based on the rank achieved)

and now, how is it going for our Komodo Island?

praise the lord, we won the place. but wait, don't get too excited. as the official website announce, those seven candidates are still temporary

"... It is possible that there will be changes between the above provisional winners and the eventual finally confirmed winners." (http://www.new7wonders.com/)

so, just wait and be patient then

early of 2012 is just one or two months away

let's keep praying for these lizards

http://touristattractionsgallery.com/komodo-island-is-the-worlds-largest-lizard

hang in there, Lizzie

we know, we will win this

Mid Term Bless

Yuuhuuuuuuuu, UTS semester 3 dengan resmi saya nyatakan selesai!

Hmm, belum sih masih ada 1 take home tapi ya... yaudah deh...

Bener-bener deh ya, di semester ini gue baru ngerasain betapa indahnya jadi anak iklan. Ngeliat keadaan sekitar yang chaos banget ngadepin ujian mereka, ngapalin ini itu, email sana sini ngumpulin bahan ujian, baju ke kelas harus rapih, bla bla bla, gue makin bersyukur aja dahh.

Gimana nggak, semester ini gue ambil 8 mata kuliah. Sebelum minggu pertama UTS, yang gue tau itu seperti ini susunan dan sistematikanya:

2 matkul open book, 2 take home, 1 common sense, 3 sisanya baru ujian sebagaimana mestinya

Tapi pas hari pertama aja, ujian Asas-Asas Manejemen, pas udah duduk manis di kelas sambil resah gelisah karena belum belajar dengan baik dan benar, dosennya bilang kalo ujian dia open book. Oke. Seisi kelas langsung meriah cem taun baru di tempat konser.

So, 3 matkul open book, 2 take home, 1 common sense, 2 sisanya baru ujian sebagaimana mestinya

Nah seminggu kemudian, sehari sebelum UTS Teknik Penulisan Efektif, gue dapet kabar dari temen gue kalo ujiannya open book juga. Pengen kayang gak sih lu dengernya, mana waktu itu hari Minggu pula. Yaudeh makin ongkang-ongkang kaki aja gua.

Berubah lagi dong komposisinya, jadi 4 matkul open book, 2 take home, 1 common sense dan 1 sisanya baru ujian sebagaimana mestinya

Dan hari ini, hari dimana seharusnya ada UTS Media dan Pemasaran Interaktif common sense dan UTS Analisis Konsumen yang beneran UTS, gue dapet kabar gembira lagi nih bahwa selain common sense, MPI boleh open source!! Dan Analkon ternyata gapake ujian-ujianan, tapi cuma ngumpulin tugas mingguan!!

BERASA KAYAK DENGER PENGUMUMAN JADI WISUDA GAK SIH LO!?

Yaudah, intinya, 5 matkul open book, 3 take home dan gak ada ujian yang sebagaimana mestinya

I LOVE ADVERTISING

Help

So it's November already.
And my blog hasn't found its former passion, eh?

3 posts on August,
2 posts on September and
An only post on October

What? Will it be zero this month?
Well if i didn't write this junk post, at least until today IT IS zero.

Really, something is wrong.
I lost much about some of my passion.
In writing, in college, in life.

Somebody please,
I need to escape.
Like right now.
Help me